"It was just us. We'd call and say some words about how hot it was or how much our legs hurt. But when we said those words to each other, each of us had a mental catalog of similar experiences, and those experiences bound us together." -Donald Miller, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years
"The kingdom of heaven is like a king who prepared a wedding banquet for his son. He sent his servants to those who had been invited to the banquet to tell them to come, but they refused to come." -Matthew 22:2-3
For the past couple of months, I've been trying to live a better story. Yeah, that's right, a better story. I drove a long way to go visit a girl, as if living out Robin Williams' famous call-to-arms, "I had to go see about a girl." I've started volunteering a couple times a week with a preschool for kids with special needs. I'm trying to be out and about doing any which thing while the weather is nice outside. I even shaved a strip into my right leg so that every time someone sees it and asks me about it, I can tell them about this idea of a better story I'm trying to live.
But a funny thing usually happens when we start talking about this "better story." Sometimes it's a giggle or even a full blown laugh. Sometimes it's a look of utter confusion. Sometimes it's a lot of questions. Rarely though is the response an overflowing excitement to jump in. I feel like this is something that is bursting out of my seams with joy and excitement, and yet in telling people about it, they don't seem to be quite as excited as I am. I'm learning that words carry immense weight, but what we do and experience is the defining quality of our lives.
Don't get me wrong. This is not a stand about "walking the walk and talking the talk." No no, this is about an invitation. You see, Jesus did a lot of teaching. A lot. But he was also SO much more than just a lot of words. He healed, he lived, he even cried. Sometimes I wonder if we haven't gotten so caught up in "talking" about Jesus with people that we've forgotten to "live" about Jesus with people. I need to explain though.
Every summer I would come back from Camp Barnabas I found myself telling as many people as I could about all the amazing things that happened and trying to explain the humor and blessing that could come from a conversation about boogers while wiping a guy my age's backside after a good solid #2. People would giggle and look interested, but at some level there is a disconnect where they can't possibly understand the beauty of everything I'm expressing. It's not that they don't care or aren't interested. But they weren't there.
Have you ever had that experience? You've just lived some amazing moment, and nobody else seems to quite get it. It's like a script without actors. We can read and read, line by line, a beautiful story with complex, deep characters who overcome incredible obstacles to achieve greatness. But without action, without movement and experience, without actors to connect with or drama to respond to, there is something missing. There is a level others aren't able to see because they never lived it. It's like Jesus.
Jesus sent his disciples out and told them to spread his word and gave them authority, but he also told them that they would be known by love and the fruit of their lives. It's as if they might have the greatest story ever told to tell, but people would see their lives and then they could have a picture of this kingdom these disciples kept talking about. The words could have been great, but if the people speaking them weren't offering something more, a better story, they would just be words. Sometimes I think that's why people get turned off to Jesus. They just hear word after word after word and then see nothing different about the story those people talking are living. It's like Paul says, "If I speak in tongues... but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal."
But it seems to me that the story Jesus offers is so much more than words. He talks about a kingdom of love and a kingdom of hope, not just in eternity but also living within us here and now. It's no wonder he compares this Kingdom to a feast a lot. It's a party, a celebration, a banquet! It is life and life to the fullest. It is love, joy, peace, patience. It is transforming. And yet, so often we live as if it is a script with no actors, as if it is just something to talk about while we go on living our stressful, packed, day-to-day lives.
I'm sick of that life. I'm convinced that God has an infinitely bigger plan for me than just getting to tomorrow safely without a scrape or a bruise. I'm convinced he's bigger than my fears and my anxieties and my insecurities. I'm convinced that his love is miraculous and will never leave me unsatisfied. So I'm trying to live this better story, a life marked by joy and passion, using my time to its fullest, all the while stumbling over myself making mistakes and getting caught up in my sin. But at the end, I hope this story invites others in. I want to share this story I'm living. To give people a picture and an invitation to this kingdom of love and joy without bounds.
forever unfinished...
